3.07.2008

God Likes Barbeque!


A reading from the book of Genesis
8:20 And Noah builded an altar unto the LORD; and took of every
clean beast, and of every clean fowl, and offered burnt
offerings on the altar.

8:21 And the LORD smelled a sweet savour; and the LORD said in his
heart, I will not again curse the ground any more for man's
sake; for the imagination of man's heart is evil from his
youth; neither will I again smite any more every thing living,
as I have done.
Yay!

Oh...wait.

Rose Shapiro on CAMsters

Here's a great review from Times Online on the book Suckers: How Alternative Medicine Makes Fools of Us All by Rose Shapiro. CAMsters (my favorite new word) are often found resorting to the Big Pharma Conspiracy to sell their potions, something Shapiro addresses.
In short, Shapiro does much, in sprightly prose, to convince the reader that CAM is a sham. She points out that many CAMsters (my phrase) deride Western medicine as driven by greed, profit and Big Pharma — while their own tills ring loudly from the sale of ineffective pills to the gullible.
The U.K. seems to have a real problem with wasting money on alternative medicine, probably due to their irrational royals who make the whole nonsense something of a fad. They need for CAM what Dawkins is to religion before their woo advances to the next level (which would put them on par with India!).

3.06.2008

Psychic to the Stars: Judy Hevenly

How many psychics to the stars are there? My Google Alert on "Psychic to the Stars" always comes up with a hit or two every week...and they're never the same person! So I decided to post each one I come across, just to develop a list. Of course, Nikki Psychic to the Stars was my first entry. My next one - Psychic to the Stars: Judy Hevenly, found on E-Vangie Tales (cute - rolls eyes).

I don't know how good she is at predictions or readings, but that's a damn good name for a porn star!

3.05.2008

More Fodder for Sheldrake


I wonder if Rupert's doggy senses are tingling?
'PSYCHIC' DOG PREDICTS QUAKE - Louth Today: "A PSYCHIC dog from Mablethorpe has stunned its owners by predicting the earthquake that shook the country last week."

Defying Evolution

So...I don't really know where to take this one. Defying evolution defies comprehension, but here we are with the story...
Toting fake gun 'defies evolution' - UPI.com: "SAANICH, British Columbia, March 5 (UPI) -- A man on Vancouver Island, Canada, 'defied evolution' by turning up at a police station with a fake .357 Magnum tucked into his waistband, officers said."

3.04.2008

Best Headline of the Day


Small iQ is proof of intelligent design for Toyota

...as it is for so many others as well, if ya know what I'm talkin' about.

3.03.2008

The Travails of Wade Frazier

What would you do if you were offered a BILLION dollars? That's right...with 'B'. As in BUH-BYE. If you're Wade Frazier, you turn it down, let the government destroy your company, and then go to jail for two years. Well, that is the story according to Wade Frazier. And all you really ever wanted to do was to provide the world with free energy.

Fortunate for us, Wade now has a website with some 1200 pages of free energy knowledge...no, wait...just some random stuff. Apparently the government destroyed the knowledge behind free energy when it destroyed his company.

See New Energy and Abundance Paradigm Radio Show with Wade Frazier if you must. You can find a link to his site from there, but I won't give him the satisfaction here. These tactics are the same ones that Kevin Trudeau uses (also a convicted felon, if you'll recall). I can't wait for the next best seller, Free Energy "They" Don't Want You to Know About.

Design Intelligence

There's an interesting little tidbit over at the Discovery Institute's Evolution News.
Evolution News & Views: Engineers Improve Human Technology by Turning to Biology
Intelligent design does not necessarily mean optimal design. Yet the realm of human technology is a realm of intelligently designed objects, many of which strive to optimize energetic efficiency. It is therefore intriguing that designers of human technology would find solutions to technological needs from the biosphere—a realm which neo-Darwinian scientists tell us is the result of blind, random processes.
So, if "intelligent design" does not mean "optimal design", what does that tell you about the intelligence of the designer? Why waste your time and resources if you're not going to pursue the optimal design when you could be watching reruns of Family Guy instead?

Only two reasons come to mind:
1) This is all just a proof of concept in order to get funding for the final design, or
2) The designer just isn't that intelligent.

2.26.2008

Kewaunee Lapseritis's Psychic Sasquatch and UFOs


Once in a blue moon, the great monuments of Woo come together in a synthesis of pure extra-dimensional pleasure. Such is the case with Kewaunee Lapseritis's account of psychic sasquatchery. Within his new book, you will find Bigfoot, UFOs, Starpeople, an account of human genesis, teleportation, secret underground laboratories, and psychic communications.

No doubt about it - this is 100% Grade A free range woo. Each page exceeds the recommended daily allowance, so use caution when reading!
From The Psychic Sasquatch and their UFO Connection:
When I asked a Bigfoot, "what about Adam and Eve?" he replied, "I don't know anything about Adam and Eve. If you want to know about them, you'll have to wait and ask our friends the Starpeople, because they are the ones who brought them." This was shocking to me indeed. He went on to say that we hairless humans were seeded later, each race being released on a continent best suited for its survival. This includes Homo Neanderthals and Cro-Magnon.
What I find peculiar about this passage is that Kewaunee still calls them Bigfoot. You'd think that after 50 years of study, he would have at least made the attempt to classify them under Linnaean taxonomy or given them a name, like Gigantopedipus.

2.23.2008

The 30-Day Sex Challenge

What beats Kevin Trudeau's 15 colonics in 30 days? How about 30 days of sex? Only this isn't a cure for weight loss - it's what God wants you to do (although weight loss might be a nice side effect). The Relevant Church of Tampa, FL, to address breakups in relationships, has proposed a 30-day challenge which would have married couples engaging in the 'wink wink nudge nudge' for 30 days straight, while singles would forgo sex during that time. The challenge runs from February 17 to March 16, so if you're just now finding out - you've got some catching up to do!
Relevant Church
People are not having enough sex. An epidemic of breakups prove the needs that lead to a great sex life are being overlooked. Dirty dishes, frumpy clothes, and a lack of authentic connections are killing the romance. A great sex life is a challenge and takes focus, determination, and planning. Some say it’s an unrealistic goal, but we disagree. We believe you can have a great sex life, in fact we believe God wants you to have a great sex life.
That's some libido-draining church! Just pray God doesn't forsake you in your time of need.

2.22.2008

Is Timothy Brantley the Next Kevin Trudeau?

Dr. Timothy Brantley is the naturopath to the stars, and he has a new book out: The Cure (Heal Your Body, Save Your Life Through Nutrition). Reading a review, one particular item stood out for me:
The Celebrity Cafe Book Review
Brantley’s personal experiences and statements about the American diet make a relatively convincing case for the causes of illness and the value of natural cures. His opinions echo those of Kevin Trudeau’s, author of Natural Cures: What They Don’t Want You to Know. The difference is Brantley’s personality and cognitive style; he is optimistic as opposed to Trudeau’s pessimism and paranoia, and seems able to offer reasonable natural alternatives without villanizing the entire medical industry.

Anyone who echoes Trudeau is not about truth in medicine...but is after a quick way to make a buck. But maybe I should reserve judgment until I read the book. Still, it's going to be hard to choke down echoes of Trudeau.

Of course, the colonic looks to be ever present. I wonder if he recommends the same regimen as Trudeau - 15 colonics in 30 days? At least, with the Colema Board, you can serve yourself in the comfy of your own home while catching reruns of Seinfeld. Take a look-see at the good time you could be having tonight:

Kevin Trudeau's Natural Cures For Wealth

Aren’t there times when you feel you have just too much money and you have no idea what to do with it? Well, “consumer advocate” Kevin Trudeau is here to help. Purchase any one of his books and he’ll gladly lighten your load through high shipping costs and subscription fees. And if you decide to cancel? Well he may just go on helping you by continuing to bill your credit card for something you don’t want. I call it "Kevin Trudeau's Natural Cure for Wealth”.

Kevin Trudeau's Natural Cures Agrees to Missouri Refunds

"I ordered a book from Kevin Trudeau (Weight Loss Cures)," wrote John C. of Indianapolis, Indiana. "They tried to sell me several other items while we were on the phone, but I told them I just wanted the book. This was in March of 2007."

John said ITV Global then charged his credit card $5.95 a month for the next several months.

"When I called them, they said this was for a newsletter," John told us. "I told them I did not order this and wanted the charges removed. Without even researching to see if I ordered this, they refused to credit all my money back.

"I did not order this product, nor did I receive a newsletter. The billing practices used by this company should be criminal," John said.

If you happen to be in Long Beach, CA this weekend, you can visit Trudeau at the Long Beach Natural Alternatives Expo. I'm sure he'll be happy to relieve you of your hard earned pay. You might be one of the lucky ones who continues to experience his brand of relief for months to come.

Russia Gets Their UFO On


The U.S. is falling behind in many areas and, despite the recent hullabaloo in Stephenville, TX, our interest in UFOs and aliens has been on the steep decline ever since the 1970's. Instead, we're more interested in the Britney Spears and Lindsey Lohans of the world. Thankfully, many other countries are picking up the slack. Russia is building a theme park that will cater specifically to alien hunters, a sure sign that they are catching up to the 70's. I wonder if we should warn them about disco...
Russia builds £3m UFO centre
It will include an observatory for people to scan the skies for UFOs, a special trail along sites of supposed UFO sightings, as well as displays and even equipment like infra-red cameras that can be rented by UFO spotters to catch aliens on film.

A lawyer is even planning to open an office there to give advice on compensation to people who have been the victim of alien abduction. Officials said they expect the centre to draw in thousands of visitors from across the world every year.

2.21.2008

Will Kansas Slip Back Into the Past?


With everything else going on this election season, little notice is being paid to the Kansas school board whose 5 out of 10 seats are up for grabs. Currently there is a 6-4 moderate/liberal majority. Two of the staunchly conservative seats will be voted on and are expected to remain conservative. But there is concern over the other 3 which are mod/lib. Based on preceding elections, the conservatives lose out to public outcry, but in the intervening years, apathy sets in.

Evolution and the yo-yo effect

Voters took exception and the board changed hands after the 2000 election, sending Gamble to her first term. By 2002, however, apathy had set in and the moderates lost a seat, resulting in a 5-5 deadlock. Then two years later, conservatives gained a majority, and soon the board was sponsoring widely publicized hearings on evolution.

Abstinence-only sex ed was also on the agenda, and the conservative majority hired a commissioner of education with zero qualifications for the job but a warm feeling for school vouchers.

Voter outrage ensued and, once again, the balance shifted in 2006.

But as Gamble mentioned, nothing is ever “fixed” with the state board for longer than one election, and control could yo-yo again. Added to the equation above is the expectation that conservatives are expected to hang onto their four seats, including the two up for a vote this year. Both incumbents – Republicans Steve Abrams and Kathy Martin -- are running.

So, Kansas, are you going to get your act together or would you rather Intelligent Design rule the classrooms?

Vote, dammit!

Homeopathy as a Replacement for Goat Balls

In the early 20th century, Dr. John Brinkley made a fortune by transplanting goat testicles into men to cure their impotence. 16,000 people received the procedure, thanks to Brinkley's direct marketing campaign, including press agents, newspaper advertising, and a popular radio medical talk show. All these people were suckered in because Brinkley had testimonials. No evidence of efficacy, no explanation of how it worked - just testimonials.

The American Medical Association is gracious enough to label homeopathy as "untested" only because they haven't shown that homeopathy can lead to the delay of receiving appropriate therapy or diverts care to unproven methods. Otherwise, it would be called "quakery". One of the hallmarks of quackery is that anecdotal evidence or testimonials is the main basis for "success" of this modality.

The idea that water retains the memory of whatever substance it formerly contained is ludicrous. The idea that drinking this water can cure you of a specific ailment other than dehydration is ludicrous. The whole concept is laughable and absurd.

Yet homeopathy has testimonials and an effective marketing campaign.

Anyone care to give up their viagra for goat balls?

2.19.2008

Liberty, Truth, and Ignorance

Ben Stein Wins Intelligent Design Award for 'Expelled'

Ben Stein has been named the recipient of the 2008 Phillip E. Johnson Award for Liberty and Truth. This award "recognizes...[the] pivotal role in advancing our understanding of design in the universe by opening up informed dissent to Darwinian and materialistic theories of evolution." This begs the question as to how our understanding of "design in the universe" is advanced by "informed dissent" of evolution. Since intelligent design is not a theory in and of itself, it resorts to pointing out supposed flaws in the theory of evolution. It does not provide any evidence in support of intelligent design. There has been no theory that has ever been supplanted with a new theory without supporting evidence.

"Liberty and Truth" in this award is a moniker for "Freedom to Remain Ignorant". Mr. Stein is well deserving of this reward.

2.15.2008

Ass Psychic to the Stars


This is the first time I've heard about "ass psychics". I am already considering a new career as a fanny phrenologist, rump reader, or an Ass Wu Master. The fringe benefits are enticing, but I'm not sure I want to typecast myself as just a psychic of the posterior. Maybe if I became "Ass Psychic to the Stars"?

Yeah...I think I may have found my calling.
Lessons Learned From ‘Elle’ Editor's Derriere Diary -- The Cut: New York Magazine's Fashion Blog

But the tale of Slowey's ass and its hard path to shrinkage only gets weirder from there. Inspired by stories of pet psychics being in touch with Vivi, the whippet who ran away from JFK airport after appearing in last year's Westminster dog show, she called her own psychic to talk about her ass. According to her psychic, "[Slowey's] ass no longer wants to be fat. It just wants to be complimented. But you are putting entirely too much pressure on it. It keeps saying, ‘Free me! Free me!’" Um, right. This is how Slowey responded:

All I have to do for my derriere to be happy is moon people and scream, "Free your ass?" Sorry, butt psychic. I am electrocuting the hell out of it at Exhale, scrunching and bumping it at Physique 57, and doing another week of juice fasting with Jill Petitjohn. Putting my ass’s happiness before my desire for a svelte silhouette is just ass-backwards…I'm getting into that Lanvin skirt, even if it means I can't bend at the waist and need two goons hauling me around by the arms around like a rusted Tin Man. To hell with my repressed ass, it's Lanvin or bust.

Paranormal Ghost Hunting (A Load of Crap)

Bexhill ghosts may be full of shite.
Paranormal 'beings' reported at the sewage station
"The conclusion is, we can't prove it is haunted because of strong electromagnetic fields, which can cause the illusion of being haunted, the feeling of being touched or watched, but there is paranormal activity."

Psychic Night - Use the Woo, Paula!

My best advice to Paula Paradaema is to use her psychic powers before entering into these business transactions. I know that using psychic energy must be physically draining, but when it comes to money and if you have the woo - use it!
Police called to psychic night
Police were called to a Lancashire pub when a psychic night ended in a heated argument.
Clairvoyant Paula Paradaema appeared at The Flag, Parkside Lane, Nateby, near Garstang, but had to summon officers when, she claims, there was a dispute over her fee.

2.14.2008

Kevin Trudeau's Valentine Day Motion

On November 16, 2007, U.S. District Court Judge Robert W. Gettleman said that Kevin Trudeau was one heck of a salesman, a prolific author, and an "exposer of corporate and government corruption". The Judge also said Trudeau was also in contempt of court.

In his opinion (pdf reference), Judge Gettleman wrote
As discussed above, Mr. Trudeau has violated this court’s order. He has misrepresented
the content of his book by stating in his infomercials that his diet protocol was “easy” and that it
allowed dieters to “eat whatever they want,” and he has misled thousands of consumers. For
these reasons, the court holds Mr. Trudeau in contempt. By separate order, the court will set a
hearing to determine the appropriate remedy in light of this opinion.
I guess those weight loss cures Trudeau touted were not as easy as he led everyone to believe. But I do wonder how many colonics it takes for some people to realize the same thing.

I also just happened to be checking the docket to see if the "appropriate remedy" will be dished out soon. All I found was a "Notice of Motion" in the FTC v. Trudeau case being heard today by the Judge. I wonder...d'ya think Trudeau might be entering a motion to wish the Judge a Happy Valentine's Day? Maybe send a box of organic chocolates and a "Thinking of You" card?